The Man In My Life

Whenever I talk to people who I have not spoken to in a while the first question I get, regardless of who they are, is "Are there any men in your life?" (or some variation of this). This usually leads me down one of two paths. I either talk about why me and Jacob are not together are not together or I get all flustered and excited about my latest crush (and subsequently when we are getting together and why we are not already). As much fun as these topics are, it gets tiresome having to talk about this all the time. So I have decided to answer the question for everyone once and for all. So here it goes...

The man in my life is someone who I never thought I would really love. I always kinda liked him and we would talk frequently but I never really LOVED him. We have had our ups and down and there have been a lot of times when I forgot about him cause there was another guy. But he stayed faithfully by my side and waited for me. He always gives the best advice and has my best in mind. He loves me unconditionally and tells me all the time how beautiful and valuable I am. I have known him forever but it was not until just recently that we really connected. He makes me the happiest I have ever been and I know that he and I will be together forever. Plus his dad is super cool. (I think his dad loves me more than my man does)

As great as my man is, I don't treat him very well. Dint get me wrong, I love him and am so grateful that he is in my life, but relationships are hard. There are, unfortunately , many times where I break promises, miss dates or ditch him for my friends. I am not very committed sometimes either. I will run to him and tell him how much I need him and want him back, but as soon as its inconvenient or difficult, I bail on him. But he still is there every time, waiting for me to come to my senses and come back to him. Some people may say that he is stupid, or that he should just let me go. I would agree with that statement, I don't deserve to have a man so great, but I do. He doesn't think he is being stupid, he knows that I am. He knows that I am going to mess up and that I am going to disappoint him, but he loves me anyway. But I think my favorite thing is that he GETS me. I never have to explain myself or what I am thinking...he just knows!

Now that I have told you all about my dream man, I figured its only fair that I give you his name...His name is Jesus. Yup that's right..I'm in a relationship with Jesus; the Savior of the world, King of kings, Lord of lords and Son of God. We face a lot of skeptics, who question the legitimacy of our relationship, but that just makes it more exciting. (I love proving people wrong) 

So for those of who who care to know, yes I am seeing someone...a very special someone...the greatest someone who ever lived. I know that even though my man is extremely jealous, that he will eventually bring another man in my life. A man who will make me happy and will take care of me. A man who also loves my man and who respects me too. But until Jesus lets that happen, I am more than happy with my relationship status (at least most days).

BB

"I am blessed"

When we greet a customer at work we usually say the following "Hi, welcome to Chick-fil-a" followed by the expected "How are you doing today?". If people do actually answer the "How are you?" question it is usually with either a less than believable "I'm fine" or an overly enthusiastic "I'm doing great" (this is usually said by those who have spent their whole day at Disney).With the occasional honest answers of "I'm tired" or "I'm a little stressed" or there may be no response at all.  But last night I heard an answer that I had never heard before. This couple walked up to the register next to mine, and when my co-worker asked the question "How are you doing tonight?" the woman responded with "I am blessed".  This caught me, as well as the customer I was serving, completely off guard. I knew from that moment that I HAD to talk to this couple. But my customer beat me to it.  The couple and my customer began to talk about the unusual response and as I listened in I was so encouraged. "It's the truth" said the woman. "I am so blessed to have everything that the Lord has given me". Both the husband and the other man agreed. "Glory to God" exclaimed the husband when both the man, and now myself, began to list some of our blessings. 

At this point, their food had come up and the man and the couple shook hands, exchanged names and went their separate ways. Luckily for me, the couple stayed in the dining room. As soon as I had the time I went over to the booth where the couple was sitting. "Do you need a refill?" I asked (I still had to do my job). "No thank you" they replied. But before I walked away I had to let them know the impact they had on me. We talked for a few minutes about our lives and what God had done and is doing, and then I had to get back to work. 

This brief interaction had lifted me spirit for the rest of the night and really got me thinking. "Why do I not respond this way?" This couple had the light of Jesus shining through them so brightly that you had to be blind not to see it. Their authenticity and "Glory to God" attitude both encouraged me and challenged me. If I was so blessed, and God has done so much for me, why do I not make it known to everyone. I want the greatness of God to be made known to all I come into contact with. I want people to know that I love Jesus just by having only a brief interaction. I want to be like this couple. 

So next time someone asks me "How are you doing today" I am going to respond with "I am blesses". Not because of the shock factor, not because I want to pay homage to this couple I met, not even to start conversation. I am going to reply "I am blessed" because that is what I am.

I the Israelite

If there is one thing that has stuck out to me in the Old Testament (or at least Genesis through Numbers), it is how ungrateful the Israelites were. They had so many encounters with God and He continually provided for them and protected them, and all they did was complain. They complained about food, they complained about water, they complained about Moses, they even complained about the Promise Land. Every time I read about one of these moments I couldn't help but say " ARE YOU SERIOUS?!". But as I began to think about it I realized that I am no different. God continues to bless me and provide for me in every way possible, but I still am ungrateful. I still complain. I am pretty sure that if I lived back in Old Testament times the ground would have opened up and swallowed me too. But thank God for His grace! He has me on a journey to my promise land but, I am too busy looking back toward Egypt that I can't even see it on the horizon. I am comfortable with my "Egypt" life of slavery and bondage because it is easy. God has something so much greater planned for me, but it requires a long walk through a difficult desert first. It requires that I don't always know the way and that I sometimes have to give up certain luxuries. I have a tendency to focus on these things instead of the BIG picture. God has promised me that He would take care of me and that He has some amazing things coming if only I would trust Him.. So am I really that different from the Old Testament Israelites who I like to judge and criticize? Sadly, the answer is no. But the good news is that God does not give up on me. He keeps bringing me back to Him, regardless of how many shortcuts I try to take, or how many places I settle that are not the Promise Land. Even though this journey is difficult and the path is unknown, I am so grateful that I have the best tour guide that ever lived.

My real college education.

Today I had my last class of the semester. I am so happy that I only have 2 days of finals and then I am home free. This semester has gone by so fast, I cant believe its almost over. I am excited for Christmas break but I am going to miss my friends here at SEU. The following is a list of things I have learned my first semester of college.

1. I am so lucky to be living with 7 girls who I get along with (I have seen Top Model, it can get ugly)

2. Ice cream cones are even better when you fill the bottom of the cone with sprinkles.

3. Midnight is still early.

4. The best places to study for psychology (or to do pretty much anything) are Starbucks and Ritas.

5. If you cannot find anything else to do, go to Wal Mart.

6. Proposals by the Jesus fountain are NOT romantic or original.

7. The greatest people can be met while waiting in line for Laser Tag.

8.If you watch the preview for the next episode of Criminal Minds, you are going to have to watch that episode.

9. Ramen is really good at 10:30pm.

10. It is a requirement to play some sort of instrument (preferably guitar)

11. Toms and skinny jeans are a must.

12. Pretty much anything can be made in a microwave if you try hard enough.

13. Leading a group of Middle School boys through a college campus can lead to some very interesting conversation.

14. I really should have read the syllabus.

15. I am incredibly blessed.

This has been an amazing semester. I have learned so much (even more than what's on this list). It has been a season of difficulty, stress, growth and joy and I can't wait to see how the next 7 semesters go.

Why I chose to not to choose Tumblr

Since I have informed people of my new found blogging passion, the only response I get is "You should have gotten a Tumblr". What they do realize is that I do in fact have a Tumblr, I just never go on it and have not posted anything (I just take up a user name and password on the site). Its not that I have anything against this increasingly popular website, its just that I realized that although I conformed to the idea of blogging, I do not want to completely convert to a Tumblr. 

From what I know of Tumblr (and my friends who have it) it is as, if not more addicting, than Facebook. due to the fact that FB already controls a majority of my free time, I just cant risk becoming addicted to yet another social networking website. (I also have a Twitter and a FormSpring). I do need to have some free time to read my Bible, get homework done and keep up with my TV shows (mostly Criminal Minds since Glee is on hiatus). I simply cannot commit to another website. It will already be a challenge balancing a blog in the mix, but due to lack of popularity and the fact that people cannot comment, like or message me about this I think I will be able to handle.

So to all my friends trying to get me to the Tumblr side of blogging I say this, I enjoy and little know blog and the fact that it takes so much effort to find and that it is not easily accessible means that any followers I get are going to be much more meaningful.

That's all for now!

BB

Blog Virgin

Today has been such an amazing day. So amazing in fact that it inspired me to start a blog. I had never really considered myself the "blog" type, but it seems like something that you do once you get to college so I figured I would join the band wagon. I don't really know what I will be blogging about hence the "babbling" part of the title. Consider these blogs like an inside look into my life, thoughts, and ideas.  So lets get this started...

I mentioned before that I had a great day today and  there are several reasons why. Not only did Chartwells actually have great food today, but I also got a perfect on my Psych quiz (which is due to the fact that my friend Zach helped me, but it was still a satisfying accomplishment) and I got to have my much anticipated coffee date with my friend Tara. But those are only the superficial reasons why December 8, 2010 was such a great day. The more significant and really the thing that I will remember most is that today I finally became content.

Contentment has been something I have been praying about for a long time now (like 4 months or so).  I have been so busy whining and complaining to God about how unfair my life was and how I didnt have anything I wanted (I call this the Veruca Salt Syndrome). But today was the day that God put everything into perspective for me. He showed me, through a conversation with a friend, what would have been the outcome if I had things me way...and it was not a positive outcome. He showed me that the place where He has put me in, both physically and spiritually, is the best place for me. I am so glad to have this burden of discontent, ingratitude and selfishness off of my back. I am so grateful that God has placed these trials in my life (which is something I never thought I would be able to say). I realize now that God really does have my best in mind and that if I just let go of the reins then He will do amazing thing in and through me.

Well, the computer in the library is giving me my time warning and I still have half a book to read for an assignment due tomorrow (oops). So I'm signing off for now.

BB